5 Stress Relieving Tips to Not Have A Breakdown During Your Session / by Shana Berenzweig


This post is part of an ongoing series focused on getting you and your family ready for a photo session. Read other installments on the Do’s and Don’ts of What to Wear, 5 Stressing Relieving Tips To Not Have A Breakdown During Your Session, and 3 Things to Help You Get Over Your Fear of Being Photographed, and check back for more soon.


Since my new Pop-Up Portrait Sessions are coming up (psst, have you booked yours yet?), I thought this would be an excellent time to start a series of blog posts to get y’all ready. This is something I’ve wanted to do for a while but, well, haven’t. Hashtag blogging is hard, y’all.

As family photo season fast approaches, I imagine there might be a few of y’all out there that are beginning to feel the first tingles of stress.

Family photos are wonderful for so many reasons. Duh. Not only do they document family growth and milestones, but they help us create fond memories, too. Not just for the parents and the grandparents, but for the children, grandchildren, and generations to come.

Clichéd? Yes. True? Yes.

But, this day can be very stressful, too. I get it.

And I want to do all I can to make sure this experience is as stress-free as possible. Because as many of longtime clients will have heard me say, if y’all are stressed and anxious it will show on your face and in your body language, and your kids will most likely pick up on it, too. We want your photos to be carefree, authentic, and full of love.

So I’ve put together a little list of five tips y’all can use leading up to, and especially on, picture day to help everyone relax.

Is this list also a little clichéd? Probably. Still true and helpful? Probably, and most definitely can’t hurt to try.

1. Take some deep breaths. A common relaxation method, deep breathing can quickly calm your stress level, you can do it anywhere, and is a great place to start when managing anxiety and stress.

Breathe in through your nose and exhale through your mouth, counting slowly down from 10 in your head while letting it all out and taking a deep breath between each number. If you’re still feeling super stressed, repeat the process again.

Another technique to relieve stress and muscle tension is to use your finger to trace a figure eight on the palm of your hand. Or before your session, try some simple stretches or yoga poses to release any tension and stress in your body.

Just because these are simple techniques, doesn’t mean they don’t work.

2. Laugh. Laughter is a great way to release stress and tension. It will also help the whole family relax before the session, as well as results in genuine smiles and interactions during the shoot.

I’m a big fan of the good ol’ fashioned tickle-monster or a good snuggle sesh to get those smiles and relieve a bit of stress.

Still working on your stand-up? Me too. So instead of jokes, for some reason having everyone pretend to laugh feels so ridiculous that everyone ends up actually laughing for reals.

These sorts of things can help to ease the family into relaxation mode before and during the session. It’s also good to remember that every photo doesn’t have to be the traditional everyone-looking-at-the-camera-and-smiling shot. It’s great to have a little variety and capture your kids being kids and reflect your family as perfectly imperfect as they are.

3. Distract Yourself. If someone is being shy, isn’t into taking pictures, is having a meltdown, or in some other way not cooperating* and you can feel your blood pressure rising, I encourage you to take a little break, maybe go for a walk or try busting out some dance moves. This will help alleviate some of your stress and the kids’ excess energy, as well as give us some good interaction shots. Another thing you can do is to simply take a step back and outta frame and let me focus on shooting other members of the family for a little bit.

*I hate to use that word, as well as break it to y’all, but when there are tiny humans involved, these kinds of things tend to happen more often than not. And don’t worry, it is TOTALLY NORMAL. I promise. So please, pretty please, don’t be embarrassed, anxious, or stressed. I get it and have seen it all.

Ahead of your your session, it may help to think of a short game that your family enjoys and can help relieve stress and loosen everyone up – it could be something as simple and silly as duck, duck, goose, or dancing to head, shoulders, knees, and toes, etc. Don’t overthink it and don’t worry if you don’t think of anything.

Still stressed? Try the old technique of going to your ‘happy place’ and try to take yourself out of the present situation and let your mind wander. 

4. Lots of XOXOs. It seems too easy and obvious, right? But not only will these make for the sweetest shots, hugs are another excellent stress reliever.

And so are kisses.

So gather your crew up in a big group hug or give your sweetie a kiss and I bet y’all feel some of those worries melt away.

If you’ve worked with me before, you know I’m a big fan of everyone touching and loving on each other. Not only do we get gorgeous images that reflect your family’s love, but it just feels good and helps everyone relax.

5. Let it go. One of the biggest stress relievers, but hardest to do, will be to try to relax and just let me take the lead.

So try really hard to keep the following in mind.

Don’t ask anyone to smile.

Don’t fix anyone’s hair.

Don’t point at the camera.

Just be, relax, love on your people, and let me do the rest.

Trust my process, hand the reins over to me, take a break from the rules, and just have some fun with your kiddos. Let it all go. I plan on covering this in more depth in another post soon, so hold tight.

So there y’all have it. Take ‘em or leave ‘em. But as my momma always says, it never hurts to try. And above all, please remember that I’ll be doing everything I can to help y’all relax and have a great time during our shoot.

I’ll be back soon with more good stuff to help y’all get ready for your close-up’s, including tips on what to wear and the eternal question of whether ‘to bribe or not to bride’ your kids.

XO